So I mean well. I really do, but getting around to writing for three blogs, still reading books to review and doing everything else takes time.
Speaking of time I am now the mother of a teenager.
How did that happen?
It really boggles my mind. When I think about it, I know I'm old enough, but my usual answer is I'm not mature enough.
I feel sometimes as though I'm drowning. Being a teenager is so different in so many ways to when I was growing up. Of course the other main difference is she's really into things like fashion. Me I couldn't give a stuff, I like my jeans, t-shirts and trainers. She loves shoes. I don't get it. What I do get is that it is her thing and so even though I'm totally out of my depth when it comes to this kind of thing, I take her shopping. It makes her happy.
School is another thing. I was never popular so I have no advice to offer there. When she comes home with questions like, 'Mum what do I do when a boy puts his hand down my friend's top and she doesn't want him to?', well there I am on far steadier ground. Bullying seems so much more intense. I was picked on, yes bullied all through my school years and yes it had an effect on my psyche. I was never beaten up and that is so much more prevalent today. That is another thing I can deal with, 'as long as you don't throw the first punch I will back you all the way.'
Everyday I'm thankful my girls come home in one piece. A little bit of emotional damage, broken heart, social uncertainty, all of that I can handle.
Last year she was so moody, I thought I was never going to get through it. But we did. This year things have levelled out some and I have been so relieved. The biggest issues this year have been friends, finding her comfort zone, getting her to do her chores and keeping her grades up, I just want a passing grade that's all.
Ups and downs are part of family life and my little girl is growing up. She had her first high school dance this year. Amongst other things. She's already talking about getting a job when she's old enough.
Parenting is a minefield that most of us are never really ready for. Each developmental stage has its own pitfalls. It is a juggling act and a tightrope act all in one. On the upside, that fact she's made it this far without being killed is a good sign. Hopefully I'll be able to get her through this next stage without either of us doing the other permanent damage.
Tonight I saw her prancing around in a pair of wedge high heels and short shorts and I realised how in trouble I'm going to be when she really starts dating. But then I have a very special set of skills that I've been honing for just that eventuality.
Also lets see if I can write here more than twice a year from now on.
